I employ concepts and approaches aimed to help empower your relationships. To help you focus on only what you can control.: your own behavior. There are many reasons one experiences rocky intimate relationships. Relationships don’t come with an instruction manual.
Having Healthy Relationships
Unhealthy relationships, dysfunctional relationships. Self-defeating relationships, chaotic relationships? These are common struggles and I can assist you. Fear of commitment, significant others who are emotionally unavailable and self-absorbed. Feelings of possessiveness and jealous toward your mate. Always feel like you are left hanging on a string. Constant angst. Waiting for text messages. “Why did he take so long to return my text? What exactly did he mean when he texted, ‘ttyl’?” Constantly feeling unwanted. Feeling rejected.
Why are relationships so difficult and painful?
I employ concepts and approaches aimed to help empower your relationships. To help you focus on only what you can control.: your own behavior. There are many reasons one experiences rocky intimate relationships. Relationships don’t come with an instruction manual. BUT, there is a common thread that runs through dysfunctional relationships. They key is for you to identify the origins of your relationship patterns. Only then can you begin to change your relationships.
Why do I have relationship problems? I need advice. I need more than advice!
It is important to identify Triggers that preceed:
1) you pushing someone away
2) you distancing yourself
3) anger and rage episodes
4) becoming suspicious and obsessive
5) feeling abandoned
6) feeling unwanted
7) feeling unlovable
I can help you identify triggers. I have been trained in techniques to help you gain new perspective. The first step is gaining insight on your behavior. I will then provide advice based on your new understanding of yourself.
Why do I continue to attract unaccountable men?
Ponder this: First, it is an expression of helplessness to believe you are a magnet for lousy men. It suggests you are a passive participant in your relationships. Second, we encounter the many of the opposite sex every day. Is it not through chance accident these men have the same qualities. Empower yourself! I can help you have a deeper understanding of yourself and who YOU are attracted to.
We interrupt this program for Breaking News. If you are still reading this, you are likely a good candidate for improving your relationships!
Parental Abandonment in Childhood
Abandonment is perceived by an adult differently than a child. Children own their abandonment. I was bad. I did something wrong. I was to blame. I did something to not be loved. What did I do to make Mom not want me?
What do children perceive as abandonment?
A parent who:
1) had an alcohol or drug addiction (click here for an excellent book)
2) was incarcerated
4) left the home
a) started another family
b) many broken promises of visitations, birthdays.
c) broke all contact
A child perceives a parent’s death in the same manner as if they had they left. Or if they were incarcerated. Why didn’t he want me? What did I do wrong? Have you ever told yourself those words in your intimate relationships? If so, you could be acting out those old abandonments.
Bad Experiences or Unpleasant Memories from Childhood
Sometimes we have bad early memories but question whether it was abusive. I can help you determine this.
1) Sexual Abuse
b) Sexual exploitation
c) Being touched in ways that caused you to feel uncomfortable
d) Taken advantage of while you were intoxicated
2) Emotional neglect
a) Parent who was absent emotionally
b) Substance abusing parent
3) Physical Abuse
a) discipline that felt to you the person was in a rage
Why discuss my past?
1) If it is causing unhealthy adult behavior then your past is…your present. If you revisit the past, you give it new meaning. This new meaning paves the way to changing the present.
Be Courageous. You can do it!
I will provide the safe environment for you to confront your pain and fears. Take charge now. Click here to make an instant appointment.